Peacemaker Principles 2020-10-14T12:51:46+13:00

The Ponatahi Christian School Prospectus

PEACEMAKER PRINCIPLES FOR CONFLICT RESOLUTION

This informal yet powerful discipline system can be used in parallel to the formal discipline on the previous pages. It is especially applicable when there has been conflict or a break down in relationships. These procedures are Biblically-based, and aim to deal with the heart of the problem: sin, self-righteousness and ill-feeling towards others. Although the Peacemaker Principles do not negate formal discipline, clearly a positive response may reduce the need for formal discipline depending upon circumstances

On the left, the slippery slope ends up in withdrawal, “everybody is wrong but me”, a very unhappy person who is no value to the greater Kingdom of God, and even potentially suicidal thoughts. On the right the attack responses are also very damaging to each other and the Kingdom of God. Both sides of the slippery slope are sinful responses with self -righteousness and the faults of others at the center. Both sides need prayer and help to get back up. But we hope that Biblically working things out will prevent slipping down the slope. The lessons learned may follow the children into adulthood.

“Work it Out” at the top starts with the four Gs or Ground Rules. It uses the 5As of Apology for the offender (usually applies to both parties) and culminates in the steps of forgiveness for the offended ones (also usually all parties involved). The following diagrams illustrate these principles. Older children may be given a more detailed model, and younger children may have it further simplified, but the principles are constant throughout the school.

The 4 G’S (Ground Rules)

  1. Glorify God: Ask yourself this focusing question: “How can I please and honour the Lord in this situation?” (1 Corinthians 10:31)
  2. Get the beam out of your own eye: Deal with any critical, negative, or overly sensitive attitudes or sinful words and actions in your life first. (Matthew 7:3,4)
  3. Gently restore: Our attitude should be one of gentleness rather than anger, and our purpose should be to restore rather than condemn. Remember that it is appropriate to overlook minor offences. (Galatians 6:1)
  4. Go and be reconciled: As you seek to forgive others and be reconciled, continually ask God for grace to enable you to forgive others as we wish to be forgiven ourselves. (Matthew 5: 24)

The 5 A’S of Apology (Confession)

  1. ADMIT what you did
  2. ACKNOWLEDGE the feelings
  3. ASK for forgiveness
  4. ACCEPT the consequences
  5. ALTER your behaviour

The Four Promises of Forgiveness

  1. “I will not dwell on this incident.”
  2. “I will not bring up this incident again and use it against you.”
  3. “I will not talk to others about this incident.”
  4. “I will not let this incident stand between us or hinder our personal relationship.”

This painted board on the wall in the principal’s office enhances the peacemaker principles, and can be used as a starting point for conversation with students about their behavior or other unresolved matters.

Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. Matthew 5:9